Mama Sez

I am at work. Our computer hasn't been the same since we moved it out of the bedroom. Who knows when or if I will have time to call and get it fixed. Brown is nutz. That is all I have to say about that. The hidden meaning is that life is normal at their house.

Flowers are blooming. Roses are getting ready to bud out. Becky has already planted tomatoes!!!! I haven't even tilled the garden. Too much to do. The floors are getting done at the house. Painted the DR and taking Beck's suggestion for gray in the LR. The basement is CLEAN!!!! thanks to Amanda and her mom Rosie.

Lots more but I must work to earn a little money to pay bills. Love you all, Mom, AKA Grandma Marty

I am so tired again. It just feels like a rollercoaster. I am up and energetic and then I am so tired I can hardly move. I am tired even thinking. Typing is making me even more tired. I have to stop. Not a joke finish later.

We have had ice storm after ice storm this year. It is weird. I can't remember a winter when it did this. It has been unseasonably warm some years, snowed alot some years, been rainy or cold and dreary but I can't remember a winter when we had one ice storm right after another.

There have been a lot of unexpected deaths too. People I know, extended families, it has really gotten to me this winter. I will be glad when Spring and warmer weather get here. My tulips and crocuses are up, nothing but moles seems to bother them.

My neighbor is continuing to call the police on me. I have been in the paper twice so far, it sounds awful, like I am a criminal or something. I wrote a letter to the editor and they actually published it, an edited version but somewhat similar to what I wrote. I wonder if I will get any flack or if I will get understanding. Big Sigh...........

I am going to work tonight 7p to 7a. The girl who is scheduled can't get out because of the ice. I am within walking distance so I couldn't very well say no. I will get Sat off instead of today and I already have Sun off. Rachael is going to KC for her MEPS Sunday. She is excited. I hope they accept her. And I pray she will succeed, she wants this very much.

Well, I have to finish drying my uniform and get a shower. Take care all. I love you.

I didn't expect another ice storm. This one has not been anything like last year thank God and I mean that. Still, I think I have an idea what PTSS feels like, the way I feel when I see everything covered and I wonder when the power will go out and then I begin to remember how dark it is at night without electricity and I begin to panic a little.

The worst thing that happened to me so far is I fell on the steps going to work last Monday morning. Man, it hurt!!! I have a huge purple bruise on my left butt, where I landed hardest and a smaller one up higher where the step got my back. I wore a cold pack on my butt at work, strapped on with a gait belt. I felt like I was in a skit for SNL. My left cheek is about 5 inches bigger than the right one. And it feels like getting stabbed with a red hot poker everytime I accidentally sit wrong or back into something. What a life.....

Mike is going back to Iraq in March sometime. Amanda and the kids might be moving in with me. Like Miki says, I will have a clean house. Amanda is amazing. She thinks cleaning is fun......and she cooks and always invites me for supper on days when I work. All three kids are sick now with URI and get breathing treatments so she needs lots of help. Courtney and the blondes were there all day. Amanda really appreciated their help. Her Mom was there until I got there around 6PM. Now I am home writing you.....and whoever you are..."HI".

I joined the MV Arts Council.....it sounds fun to me. Robert introduced me to an artist here in town and it just went from there. I hope to get my self on track with painting because these people are like me, amatuers but avid about loving art. And they have shows that sell stuff.

Well, it is late and I go to work tomorrow. Two 12 hour shifts and I am off for the next 3 days. Big sigh..... I'll be glad when the weather turns warm, there have been a lot of deaths this winter and I am ready for it to slow down. I have known some of these guys for 6 years and it is not easy to see them go, even if I believe they are better off. I miss them.

I had to go to court again because of the guy next door. Another $47 I don't have. The old Walnut's is opening up, maybe someone over there will be more interesting and he will find another diversion.

Love to all
MedECal

Ryan and I are going to Republic Ford to see if we can get him a car. I don't like doing stuff like this. It is stressful for me. If Quint or Jeff were here or someone I trusted, maybe Robert, I would rather a man go with him to negotiate but it is only me.

We'll see what happens. I called the local banks but they won't loan without a co-signer and I can't, neither can Rachael, it would make her debt ratio too high and she wants to buy a newer car when her income tax refund comes back. She may not get a refund though.

Also the banks won't loan on anything older than 2002. I guess thats not bad but I don't think he can afford anything that new. ANyway, if he gets a car from the tote-your-note place and pays it off he will have credit then to get a loan from the bank. Cliff said to get a credit card and pay it off every month but I am scared to death of credit cards. I am not good at all with them and I am afraid Ryan might get into trouble with them also. He doesn't have a good concept of money. Neither do I as my poor credit score will attest. Big big sigh.............

Mother had good money sense but I didn't get that from her unfortunately.

Well, time to travel. Talk to ya later.

God has a weird sense of humor. The woman I was laying for was off today! I hate when He saves me from myself.LOL So now enough time has passed that I am not in danger of cutting my own throat.

Still, I do not like meow, meow women.

Good day. I ran......yes r-a-n!! There was a stat page over the phone system about 4pm and I was in the front reception area. I ran all the way to D-wing. Man, it felt good at the time. But now...well, not so good. But I ran and for a 60 year old fat woman that was good. The charge nurse was behind me. After the situation was under control she said you move fast when you want to and of course that made me feel good. I asked her if I "jiggled" and she said not so much....Hahahahahaha. It was a hoot.

I am so glad to be h ome. I keep day dreaming about selling everything I own and finding the cheapest place on a beach in the USA and living there. Maybe a beach in Central America, real estate in the US is expensive on the beach. Really, when I am getting stressed at work I start to plan my get-a-way. I plan for about 12 hours a day. Basically from when I clock in until I clock out.

Well, thats it for today. I am clogging my arteries with a grilled cheese sandwich Ryan made and I don't care.

Love ya

I don't know if everyone has to work with snippy, mean-mouthed, paranoid people, I hope not, but I do.

I have been the paranoid part at times. Anyway, I am about fed up with duplicitious, meow meow, women!! The person who worked for me on Saturday said exactly what I said someone would say, that I had called in to go to the funeral. Those of you who know me, know how I dislike people who do stuff like that. I just want to scream.

When I was a kid, my way of dealing with stupid people was to confound them with big words. That is why I read the dictionary, that and I was bored and had nothing else to read at times. Big sigh, I was not a nerd, I was a bully.....

Anyway, I have been preparing for tomorrow for a few weeks. A confrontation.....ooooooooo. I have prepared to lose my job, big deal, I can get another one the day after tomorrow. Maybe in your state....
But I have to say something! I feel like I am going to blow up if I don't decompress by letting some of my thoughts out. I have watched the Unit Managers roll over residents and families long enough. If I don't clear the air, I will not respect myself. When something is wrong, it is wrong and if I know that and do nothing then I am part of the bad stuff.

Let you know what happens. Better start praying now.......

I didn't go to work after all. I am having spasms in the muscles on the left side of my neck. OUCH!!! I did this a couple of years ago and the doctor said it was caused by a virus???? Weird. Anyway, I couldn't bend my neck to get in the car, it hurt to brush my hair so bad I didn't. I called in and had the day off. I didn't go to the funeral anyway. Couldn't get in the car and if I could have, I couldn't have stood the ride. Old age stinks!

I did get two paintings drawn and ready to apply the good stuff, you know paint.... It will have to wait until tomorrow now. I have to shower and get ready for work tomorrow. As long as I don't have to bend my neck, it will be ok.

I am getting the gardening bug BAD! Looking through my books and planning my Spring assault on the ground, ooorrrraaaahhhh. I will try to keep it simple and small. We'll see what happens.

Going now, love you all, Mom/Grandma

If I had a diary, this would be it I guess.

Anyway, I went to Bob Mitchell's viewing tonight in Joplin. It was at Parker Mortuary. That is the same place that did Mom's service when she passed. I paid my respects and gave Ruth the card from me and started to leave but she wanted me to stay and just hold her hand. It has to be so hard to let go of someone you have loved for 64 years.

There were lots of people. I knew there would be, Bob and Ruth had lots of friends. The funeral is tomorrow but I couldn't get off work. I would have gone to the funeral too but at least I was able to go to the viewing.

I was listening to Michael W Smith's Christmas album. I know, LOL, but it is so good. I love music that just swells your soul and that album does. I'll listen to it all year. Probably wear it out. I wish I had one of those little things Ryan and Rachael walk around with in their ear. I would sneak it into work and listen to it when no one was looking.....Hahahaha

This is my long weekend. Three 12 hour shifts, yuck. Oh well, next weekend is my long weekend, 3 days off. It is all relative. Got to wash my uniform pants. I need to buy some new ones, these are about thread bare.

You all have a great weekend and notice how beautiful everything is and how much God loves YOU!!! And I love you too!!!!!

Jeff returned my Christmas card. I received it today. It makes me a tiny bit sad but not devestated. For me prayer is the only proven way to find peace about problems I can't fix. Knowing that I don't have to fix things, that God is in charge of the "fix-it" department and that He'll let me know when I can help....well that's workable for me. Hahahaha Bet God is glad I said that..........Hahahahaha